I’m not sure how true this may be, nor am I certain there’s a study or a science that could back this possibly careles claim, but i think that we need depression to survive.
So I might have baited you with that one, but what I mean is that the creative spirit needs something akin to pain to thrive…in a weird way. Don’t get me wrong, happy is good, and happy is productive and light and laughter and great, but there’s a freedom that comes with the darkness.
In my mind, there’s significance in the idea that God himself created from nothing, that the darkness was His canvas.
So maybe i’m just trying to justify my process; one that involves the sombre melodies of Adele, Ed Sheeran, Kwabs and Florence + the machine to name but a few. Maybe i’m trying to hide behind one evil to vindicate another; that hurting feeds me and makes me feel…good.
Good is a bad word, it makes me feel, alive.
Being happy makes me happy, but i know that happiness is just one side of the coin, a few colours within the spectrum and those colours don’t interest me. I work best when the canvas is blank and the colours are barely that. That way the creation speaks for itself, without the distraction from those darn bountiful, buoyant hues.
My sister once said it wasn’t healthy, and she’s right. But we can’t deny the power pain has in igniting the soul.
And those are just two examples, albeit not enough to sway the mind and convince you that i’m right, but i’m not here to prove that i am. I’m probably very wrong.
What I am here to do, is to help you understand that if, like me, you find secret solace in your pain and it helps move you and inspire you, don’t be afraid.
You aren’t alone.
I was the kid that painted with the colour black, i love wearing Brown and grey and i’m fine with it. You should be too. Sure it might mean you’re weird, but who isn’t?
To those of you who’re foaming at the mouth, eager to protest my views, i love the Sun too, butterflies make me smile and laughter fills me in ways I couldn’t possibly begin to explain.
Like I said, it’s a wide spectrum, so feel free to pick your poison.